Rubyellen
A mom, homeschooling five girls; True, Brave, Soul, Glow, and Red. A wife of an amazing husband. A blogger, craft stylist and a vintage shop owner.

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PURSUE LOVE

I was great with children until I had my own and became a Mother, then I was horrible. In fact, I always thought I was really good with children because I went to school to be a teacher. I actually taught fourth graders at an elementary school. But being a mom of five girls revealed to me how selfish I really was and how much I valued myself.

I didn’t like to be uncomfortable or didn’t like my day to be disrupted. But since having children, that all went out the window. I knew I needed to pursue love. And who’s the greatest example of love but in Jesus?

I learned selflessness through pursuing Christ. He was the perfect sacrifice who died for us, we are imperfect, totally imperfect people. With five girls and seeing so much of my failures and struggles with loving them imperfectly, it points me back to Jesus. Being a mother points me to God, to trust in him instead of trying to be perfect, because I’m not. Jesus was perfect in my place—and just showing that to my girls and showing them they have a mom who loves them imperfectly is all that’s needed of me.

I’m constantly having to ask them for forgiveness saying, “You know, mommy messed up today. I’m sorry. Do you forgive me?” and just showing them what love is. My love is imperfect, and showing to them I’m imperfect, helps them see love differently through the eyes of God.

Jesus loves all of us. And when we continually mess up and trust God; we could use this opportunity to show our children humility and how to love imperfectly. This could  help us love each other well. 

Motherhood continues to be and is always a constant evolving changing relationship I have with my children. 

Motherhood continues to be and is always a constant evolving changing relationship I have with my children. 

Photography by Jen Sosa

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